Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/index.php on line 11

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/index.php on line 11

Warning: session_start(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_cookie.php on line 8

Warning: session_start(): Cannot send session cookie - headers already sent by (output started at /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/index.php:11) in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_cookie.php on line 8

Warning: session_start(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_cookie.php on line 8

Warning: session_start(): Cannot send session cache limiter - headers already sent (output started at /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/index.php:11) in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_cookie.php on line 8

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 125

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 125

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 126

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 126

Warning: strtotime(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 136

Warning: strtotime(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 136

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 142

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 142

Warning: strtotime(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 136

Warning: strtotime(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 136

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 142

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 142

Warning: strtotime(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 136

Warning: strtotime(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 136

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 142

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 142

Warning: strtotime(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 136

Warning: strtotime(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 136

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 142

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 142

Warning: strtotime(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 136

Warning: strtotime(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 136

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 142

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 142

Warning: strtotime(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 136

Warning: strtotime(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 136

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 142

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 142

Warning: strtotime(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 136

Warning: strtotime(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 136

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 142

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 142

Warning: strtotime(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 136

Warning: strtotime(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 136

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 142

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 142

Warning: strtotime(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 136

Warning: strtotime(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 136

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 142

Warning: date(): It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected the timezone 'UTC' for now, but please set date.timezone to select your timezone. in /home/songwr5/public_html/forum/bb_functions.php on line 142
hi, i need some feedback on a song im busy writing... ;)
 | Forums | Reply | Search | Statistics |
Important Announcement: SongWritingFever.com will be shutting down all user-interactive pages effective as of Saturday 13 September 2014. We are very sorry about this. We will be working very hard to bring it back as soon as we can in a much better shape than it is now. What this means is that you will not be able to submit or view lyrics, upload or download songs, view other members profiles, sign up or sign in, or post to the forum. Again, we are terribly sorry about this and we hope that we can bring all those functions and more back soon.
SongWriting Fever Forums



Songwriting Collaboration Request SongWriting Fever Forums / Songwriting Collaboration Request /

hi, i need some feedback on a song im busy writing... ;)

 
Danica De Jongh  
Forums Member
#1 | Posted: 26 May 2014 05:14
hi, im busy writing a song that basically represents certain things in my life, each line has it's own full story... Anyway i need some feedback on it so far, and im not requesting a collaboration to finish the lyrics i just need some feedback and suggestions if necesary...

(verse 1)
I dont wanna lose you but i am so lost,
how do i find all the things that are gone?,
and you, i want you to know that i love you.
Trying to move forward accepting mistakes,
the past is the past it's what has made today,
and you, i need you to know what im saying is true.

(pre-chorus)
(im still working on it...)

(chorus)
staring at the ceiling falling to the ground,
finding the lost things and losing the found,
when you stop looking back and look ahead,
know now that everything has been said.
Staring at the ceiling falling to the floor,
the things that's forgotten apearing once more,
when the sky is blue and blood turned to red,
know now that everything has been said...


As i said earlier, each line has it's own meaning... For example the line in the chorus "when the sky is blue and blood turned to red" means when everything goes back to normal - no more worrying about the past and every apology has been accepted and forgotten...
So, what do you think?
Bryce Walding Male  
Forums Member
#2 | Posted: 26 May 2014 15:50
Looks great

Can't wait to see the whole thing. Have you thought about the style of music you want to accompany it ?

__________________
Regards
Bryce Walding
Danica De Jongh  
Forums Member
#3 | Posted: 26 May 2014 23:41
Bryce Walding
hi, thanks so much!
I have and i was thinking that the verses are gonna be slow-ish, and i was planning on the pre-chorus to be inbetween slow and fast to take it into the fast exciting chorus... I was planning for the genre for this song being rock...
Riad haydar  
Forums Member
#4 | Posted: 30 May 2014 03:37
Great ! Amazing lyrics !
I wish that i could help you !
Danica De Jongh  
Forums Member
#5 | Posted: 30 May 2014 05:33
Riad haydar
thanks, and no it's ok...!
Danica De Jongh  
Forums Member
#6 | Posted: 31 Jul 2014 10:40
hey guys, one more question bout this song...
Looking at it so far, what can i title it? What name can i give to the song?
Jason Michael Rosario  
Forums Member
#7 | Posted: 1 Aug 2014 02:13
How bout true love or love story
morti meni  
Forums Member
#8 | Posted: 1 Aug 2014 10:55
chorus is always shorter than verse
think of me, the past is the past
JAKE.  
Forums Member
#9 | Posted: 1 Aug 2014 15:11
Hi. I LOVED that chorus! So killer! I had a suggestion for the first verse though. Hope you like it...

Trying hard to hold on
while I'm already so far gone
And how do you find the things you've lost?
When finding them comes with new-found cost
Moving ahead with my mistakes
because I know they are the bricks of today
& you should know I love you, yes I do
I hope you hear what I'm saying to you

....I also think you would do just fine leaping straight from the verse to the chorus without a pre-chorus because your chorus is so strong. In any event, really loved that chorus. Blew me away. If I can help further please let me know.

-Jake.
 
Songwriting Collaboration Request SongWriting Fever Forums / Songwriting Collaboration Request / hi, i need some feedback on a song im busy writing... ;) Top
Your Reply Click this icon to move up to the quoted message


login